Sons of the Shepherd

  When Silent Nights Don’t Feel Holy “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” — Psalm 34:18       The Christmas spirit is in full swing.  One of my favorite parts of Christmas is caroling.  I know that might sound odd coming from a guy with absolutely zero musical talent, but there was always such joy in singing to our neighbors, shut ins, and nursing homes.  One of my personal favorite Christmas hymns is Silent Night.  There’s a line we sing every December without thinking: “Silent night, holy night…”   But when you’ve buried the one you love, silence can feel anything but holy.   Silence suddenly has weight.   It echoes.  Silence is especially difficult for me personally.  I am an extrovert.  I love to talk with people and I find such joy and fulfillment by being surrounded by others.  BUT my most meaningful and in depth conversations came with Tif...

God’s Faithfulness in the Final Days “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” — Psalm 34:18       There are moments in life you never forget. For me, the last days of Tif's life are etched into my soul. They were holy and heartbreaking, peaceful and painful, full of love yet lined with the reality that she was slipping from my hands and into the Father’s arms.  I am currently reliving those days as I quickly approach the one year anniversary of her homecoming.  I remember sitting in hospital rooms.  I vividly remember sounds, smells, and most of all I remember sitting with my wife as she prepared for her final lap.  I was so sad, my heart shattered as if someone had taken a hammer to it.  But my love for Tif never once diminished.  She was the bravest, most courageous woman.  She was also the most faithful.  She transitioned her battle from cancer to facing death, and together, hand in hand...

  Confusion      Last winter I was shopping at Wal-Mart when all of a sudden something struck me.  I forgot why I was there.  I drew a total blank.  I knew I was there to shop, but what for I had no idea.  To complicate matters I forgot which door I came through and where I parked my car.  I was totally confused.  Sadly this has become a part of my normal life and I haven't quite unlocked how to fix it.  I forget to text, I have forgotten to pay bills, I have missed appointments, and there is probably a long list of things that I have neglected regarding my job.  It is so extremely difficult to focus.  I have adopted using a calendar and alarms, but even those aren't adequate.  There are times when my alarm goes off and I have no idea why I set the alarm.  It's extremely frustrating because my current ministry is extremely demanding and I know that my grief has stolen my sharp mind that used to never forget a sin...